Sidewalk Chalk Talk: Heidi Fiedler

What did you use to do during recess?

I was hanging out under the trees, listening, watching, trying to figure out how to act normal, and making up elaborate games with friends.

Did you think of yourself as a creative kid? What does creativity look like for your these days?

I spent a lot of time acting and singing as a kid, but I never thought of myself as especially creative, maybe weird, but not really creative. I started feeling like maybe I was creative when I became an editor. That was the first time I felt like creativity was valued and considered an essential part of the job rather than a distraction.

My job is still super creative, but with deadlines and client work, it can get lost. I feel most creative when I’m working on a personal project or helping a client develop something new. Painting is my totally no-pressure creative outlet. I’m never going to try to make money with my paintings or even really explain them. It just makes me happy to see them. And I truly enjoy the process. I pretty much have zero angst when it comes to painting!   

How much time do you get to work on creative projects?

These days I get about 2 hours a day to do client work and make progress on my personal projects. Sometimes I just dip in and scribble down an idea to come back to later, but I try to devote at least one block of time to my biggest personal project. Right now that’s a book about creativity and motherhood.

How did motherhood change your creative practice?

Becoming a mother forced me to commit to being an artist. There’s nothing like not being able to do something you were conflicted about to make you love it, and the first few months of motherhood, I couldn’t do anything creative. I craved writing the same way I missed talking to friends and traveling. Over the last few years, there were so many times it would have been totally sensible to let it go. Health problems. A disastrous agent. A million no thank yous. But every time I took a break and I was forced to choose, I decided to keep going. Now I know even if I take a break or progress is slow, I’m a writer, and I hope I’ll be an artist until the day I die.

How does art enrich your life? How does being a mother enrich your art?

I’ve always loved having a gallery wall somewhere in the house, and during lockdown, I found myself lingering in front of our prints and photos. They elevated our space and made it feel more personal, less claustrophobic. The beauty felt reassuring, like there’s still good in the world. Visual art felt truly nourishing and essential. Same with books and good tv! Sharing the space with my husband and son means we share visual references, jokes in books, and shows that we all like. It’s so basic, but it feels like such a gift.

Because I work on children’s books, I suppose being a mom gives me an intimate muse, but I’m not really studying my son, looking for ideas or answers. And while I would like to say he has inspired me to be more playful or something breezy like that, I’m not sure that’s really true. I like playing for my own sake, and it doesn’t really have that much to do with the way he plays. Mostly I think becoming a mother has deepened me, made me stronger and more patient. And I’ve surely never paid such close attention to something as watching my son grow, so I feel like a better observer. Those qualities might not directly translate to being a more proficient artist, but they must make me a more interesting person. Hopefully I’m a little wiser too, and that has to make me a more thoughtful writer.

When do you feel most creative?

When there’s no rush and I don’t know what I’m going to make. I just have a bunch of ideas, inspiration scattered all around me, and I can get lost in it.  

What helps you make time and space for being creative? How do you avoid burn out?

I’m always wondering if I’m spending my time the right way. Part of what helps me write and paint is that I actually enjoy it. They’re not shoulds on my to-do list. They’re treats. Sometimes it’s tricky to have the energy or focus I need to feel like I’m making progress, but I’m always glad when I get time to do something creative.

It helps when I have my supplies ready to go and can just pull out a box. I even do that with my writing projects, storing my notes and inspiration in a box, so it’s all easy to find when I have a few minutes to work.

For me burn out tends to come from all the other areas of my life, not my creative projects. If I can take something off my list or put it on hold, I usually feel lighter. Basically I go way slower than I want to go. And I try to trust that if I feel like I need a nap, that might be the best use of my time. Often I need less time than I think I do. I wish I was escaping to a seaside castle for a month, but the truth is that fifteen minutes of sleep and fifteen minutes of writing can help me feel energized and inspired enough to keep going.  

Who would you love to collaborate with? What’s a dream project for you?

I really love collaborating. One day I want to work with Julia Denos on a picture book! She’s always inspiring me with her process and philosophy. And of course, her work is gorgeous.

Chronicle, Abrams, Flying Eye, and Enchanted Lion are my dream publishers to work with. I love picture books that leave room for readers’ imaginations and break some rules. On paper they seem like they shouldn’t work, but they’re an unforgettable joy to read.

Outside of my genre, I love Chanel Miller’s work, and I would love to find a way to work with Anthro or contribute to Cup of Jo and Girls’ Night In.

What’s inspiring you outside of your own genre?

I’m always reading magazines and blogs about business and science. They aren’t really my main areas of expertise, but they give me new ideas. And I think somehow (maybe, possibly?!) all the Vogue tutorials I’m watching are informing my work. They’re definitely make me think about what parts to speed up and slow down.

How would you like the world to see artists and mothers?

I wish artists and mothers were valued more. The world would be an infinitely harder place without us. Our work might not be valued, but it’s essential, and I hope our children will encourage each other to pour themselves into it. Care giving, meaning making, witnessing, and creating beauty. This is the work we are here to do.  

If you had a million dollars to make the world a better place, how would you spend it?

I would open a library. The ripple effects would be huge! Everyone needs a library that feels like home and a magic hideaway all rolled into one.

What would you bring to a favorites party?

Spraying The Poet body mist from Under Aurora is my favorite way to instantly feel a little lighter. It’s the perfect mix of jasmine, grapefruit, and sandalwood, doesn’t make me sneeze, and brightens my day. I spray it when I need a little boost. 

The Sidewalk Chalk Talks are inspiring interviews with mothers who are making space for creativity and finding ease and joy in the process. The women I admire are bright, visionary creatures who love their work and their families. The different dimensions of their lives enrich each other and the world we share. The first interview is with me—Heidi! I have a three-year-old son, and I adore him.